It has been a very cold winter here in California.  As gas prices skyrocket, our family has made a conscious decision not to turn on the heater, no matter how cold it gets. Our gas bill normally is under $50, but due to the rise in gas, it has 3 times that amount; therefore, we opted to forgo having heat for now.  At first, it was hard to get used to the cold in the early morning and late evenings.  To combat this chilly indoor condition, we all bundled up in our biggest jackets, thickest sock, and knitted hats.  That seemed to alleviate and retain some heat, but when it was time to do some active work around the house, such as cooking or cleaning, it was difficult to move with all these layers on.  As native Californians, we are accustomed to warm, sunny weather.  The cold season has always been brief, not like these last few months.  The other day, hail came down in on my windshield as I drove; it was a sight to see.  The chilly weather continues outside and inside, as our thermostat reads a consistent 60 degrees Fahrenheit. Lent begins with this cold weather backdrop, making the lenten goals I set for myself quite challenging.  Giving up a bit of sleep and offering up my early mornings to God ( goal to wake up at 5 am) did not seem too out of reach.  As the days rolled on, this Lenten challenge became harder and harder to do.  First, it was adjusting to the time change and setting the alarm at 5 am, then I was challenged with the icy cold air as the alarm wailed at 5 am, and next, I rationalized to myself that it is ok to sleep a bit more in the warm bed because I don’t want to get sick getting up so early.  

How does our own mind convince us to go against our own plans?  This is a good example of not always trusting in our own willpower.  When our willpower fails, guilt sets in, and that is when doubt creeps in to make us lose our focus and aim.  Our spiritual GPS gets disrupted.  Whenever we are at a crossroads of doing our will or God’s will, we are led back to the Cross, the Passion of Christ.  We must learn to suffer, no matter what or how much our mind and body wants to resist.  It is by giving up a piece of ourselves that we can let God come in and fill us with his strength and love.  It is only with his help that we can overcome our weaknesses and get back on the right path.  It is easy to suffer when we can control the circumstances, people, and place but to suffer well when we have no control and to trust in God’s providence and consolation only is suffering offered up to God.  In this place of pure trust and faithfulness, we have put “First things first.”  If we stumble and fall in our suffering, it is okay as long as we get up again and continue.

From Thomas A Kempsi:The Imitation of Christ,” It is good for us to have trials and troubles at times, for they often remind us that we are on probation and ought not to hope in any worldly thing.”  What counts is perseverance in our walk, no matter the number of times we stumble and fall.  These stumbling blocks and falls are only opportunities for us to perfect our virtues.  We cannot perfect our virtues if we are not given an opportunity to practice and test them out on real people, situations, and circumstances. Let us put practice this Lent to putting “First Things First”